18 Blissful Years

A special surprise on my table on the 1st day of work 2012

Thank you so much Allah for giving me such a wonderful soulmate as my life partner and I pray that You will always keep us together, di dunia dan akhirat..

"You are my sunshine,
My only sunshine,
You make me happy when skies are gray,
You'll never know dear, how much I love you,
Please don't take my sunshine away.."

Happy 18th Anniversary, my darling AZ. My one. My only.

CONGRATULATIONS TO ADLINA!!

CONGRATULATIONS to our princess Adlina for getting 5As in her UPSR Exam!! Papa and Mama are soooo proud of you darling!! Woohoo!! You beat Bang Long & Hakim!! Girls Rule!! You Go Gal!!

Syukur Alhamdulillah... (^_^)

Labaikallah Hummalabaik..

Alhamdulillah, we received confirmation last night that our Visa Umrah has been approved and Insya Allah we will be embarking on our spiritual journey soon..

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah perjalanan kami ini dan terimalah segala amal ibadat kami.. Janganlah Kau menduga kami dengan dugaan-dugaan di luar kemampuan kami.. Tingkatkanlah kesabaran kami dan hilangkanlah kemarahan kami.. Ya Allah, kami pohon dariMu kesegaran tubuh badan semasa menjalankan ibadah ini, kuatkan keimanan dan kepercayaan kami, tambahkanlah ilmu pengetahuan kami, keberkatan rezeki, peluang bertaubat sebelum mati, mendapat rahmat pada saat kematian menjelang tiba serta mendapat pengampunan selepas mati. Hanya kepadaMu tempat kami memohon dan berlindung, Ya Allah.

Sebelum berangkat, saya ingin meminta ampun dan maaf dari hujung rambut ke hujung kaki sekiranya saya pernah menyinggung perasaan sesiapa di sini by something I said, or didn't say, did or didn't do, or if something I had written had hurt any of you here. Dalam pergaulan dan interaksi kita seharian, dalam keadaan sedar ataupun tidak, kita pasti ada melukakan hati, menyakiti, menaikkan kemarahan, mendukakan, menyinggung perasaan... and for all that, I sincerely apologize from the bottom of my heart. Minta dihalalkan makan dan minum..

Labaikallah Hummalabaik..

Bonjour Paris

Had an amazing week in France this week, working for 2 days with clients in Nantes and enjoyed the sites and sounds of Paris with AZ thereafter. Will write more about this beautiful city when I'm not so jet-lagged, but for now, do enjoy some of the pictures...

The awe-inspiring Tour Eiffel

Me, a mime & the Arc de Triomphe

The Champs Elysees, home to sinful designer labels

AZ in the Sully Wing at the Louvre

The Pyramide seems out of place but somehow

blended with the centuries old Louvre Palais

The view from the Eiffel Tower is simply breathtaking

Thanks so much to Encik Mazlan & Puan Normah for this work-cum-pleasure trip. And to my darling AZ, thank you for the really special Anniversary presents (^_^)

1.1.11

The first day of every year is always special to me as it marks the anniversary of my marriage to AZ. We have been together for 17 years and I am so thankful to Allah for giving me the blessing of a soulmate. Alhamdulillah..

When you start your life together with someone, you always pray for the best but you never know where the relationship will take you. In my field, I have seen so many marriages crumble and end in bitter divorces and separations. I have seen friends who were so in love with each other but after a few years of living together, prefer to live separate lives. In a world full of distractions and temptations, lasting meaningful relationships are becoming less and less of a norm.

In the past 2 years, I've been called to speak at several seminars to advice women on their rights in law. I met many women in sad, abusive relationships. Some women are in unhappy relationships but have chosen to stay married for the sake of their children. Others stay married although they know of their husband's infidelities as they feel that they have no other options. For some, being married is just a matter of convenience.

And this is why I am so thankful to be with AZ. He accepts me as I am (fat + fluff included!). He understands me so well. He amuses me when I'm down. He shares in my joy and achievements. He supports me in all my endeavours. AZ completes me. He is my companion, my strength. AZ is my life.

We have both grown so much in this relationship. We have changed and evolved over these 17 years. And we are lucky that these changes have brought us together and not apart. Every day I love and respect him more and more. I never believed this could be possible.

To AZ: Happy Anniversary, darling. Thank you for everything that you are to me. I am really blessed to have you and our lovely children in my life. Alhamdulillah..

To everyone out there: Wishing all of you a Very Special New Year full of happy surprises, unexpected opportunities and wonderful achievements! Let's all resolve to be a better person this year (^_^)

Another Year Added

my beautifully wrapped present

A day becomes special when the people you love around you make it special. Otherwise it's just another ordinary day..

I feel lucky I have so many people around me who have made my day so special today.. Thank you so much to AZ and the kids for the presents. I love them! AZ completed my iPod RED collection and the kids shared to buy Mama 2 new pets.. I strongly suspect that although the terrapins are Mama's birthday present, they were chosen more for Adlina & Anas to play with ;) I adore them nonetheless (thanks to Ateh for going to the pet shop & helping them buy the terrapins. And thanks for the 30% discount!!).

More importantly, I had a very special conversation with AZ yesterday over lunch which made me feel all warm and fuzzy. He may not have noticed how important those words were to me, but they were rare and precious, and reassuring. I will remember and treasure them.

Thanks to the team members of Messrs. Adillah A. Nordin for the surprise birthday party! It means a lot to me. It made the day special, and not just ordinary.. Thanks.

Just to share 2 memorable Haha :D scenes:-

Scene 1: Venue - Subaidah Restaurant, Jln Hang Tuah

Papa: Hakim has something for you from all of us.

Hakim: Here's your present Mama. Guess what's in it!

Mama: (Looking at the size of the beautifully wrapped box which could easily fit a ring) Is it jewellery? (asking hopefully!)

Hakim: (Looking panic stricken) Errr.. Guess again.

(So, it was the latest iPod Nano with touch screen! Not a jewellery!)

Scene 2: Venue - Home

Mama: Thank you so much for the terrapins! What a surprise!

Adlina: We all shared to buy the present, Mama.

Adlan: Hmm.. actually Mama, I had nothing to do with it. Really.

Adlina: Err.. Bang Long. Hakim took your money from your wallet..

Adlan: Haaaakkiiiimm!!!

Have a great day everyone.. (6_6)

Lost Palm

I lost my phone yesterday. With it went over 2 years of special text messages that I have saved from AZ and encouraging words from friends and family. These are messages that I read again and again whenever I feel a little bit down. Now they are gone. It's heartbreaking.

Happy Father's Day

Wishing AZ a very Happy Father's Day!! Thank you for being such a wonderful father to the kids. We LOVE you, Papa... We celebrated the evening together last night at the movies watching Toy Story 3 in 3D. What a great movie about friendship (I cried twice!).

To Apak, Happy Father's day and Thank you for everything that you have done for me and you are to me. I love you, Apak..

Happy Birthday to Adlina & Papa!

Happy 11th Birthday to our precious princess Adlina & Happy 47th Birthday to my one and only AZ.. I am truly blessed by Allah for having both of you in my life <3

The Year That Was

It is unbelievable that I have left this page unwritten for nearly a month. So much has happened in the last few weeks of December 2009 that I feel it was somehow a good closure to the year. I've had a lot of time to self-reflect on the decisions that I have made in 2009 and how these decisions had affected the people around me. It seems surreal now looking back on the changes that had happened in my life in the past year.. 

For the Firm, I would consider 2009 as the turning point. The move to our new building was more than a re-location to a better venue, a better address. The move also signified the change that was inevitable for the Firm, to re-focus on its core values and principles, and translate them into the specialized services that we now know we are best at. 2009 was a time for our Team to re-new our bond and commitment in a fresh new environment. With a new spirit, new strategy and new synergy, we hope to propel the Firm to a higher level in 2010.

2009 also gave me the opportunity to give back to the community. Being involved in St David's PTA has been a very rewarding experience for me. I've been given the chance to make important and significant changes in a school which needed so much help, and these changes will benefit so many children and teachers. It's so fulfilling. I have made new acquaintances and developed new friendships. I am proud to have a team of very committed and passionate parents who are willing to sacrifice so much of their time and energy towards a good cause. We hope to continue with our efforts in 2010 and I'm so excited just thinking of what we can do and the people that we can help.

At home, the kids just grew too fast in 2009 with Adlan leading the way in growth. He is way taller than Papa & Mama at 5'9". Hakim has finished his primary school in 2009 and will now join Adlan in St David High School. Adlina has blossomed into a pretty young lady, very tall for her age and Anas is now so much more independent than before, sleeping by himself and hardly coming to our bed in the middle of night. But most importantly, our relationship with the children have strengthened as they grow. We discuss things with them, and have good conversations with them as they are big enough to form their own opinion on many things. It's just so amazing. As they grow further in 2010 and beyond, I just pray to Allah that this precious bond that we have with them will strengthen further. 

For me and AZ, there are just no words to describe. It is incredible that love can grow even more when you feel that you have loved your utmost. I feel that we now know each other even better than before. His love, understanding and support has been the strength that I needed to go through the challenges throughout the year. Thank you for always being there for me, sayang. Happy 16th Anniversary..

Ya Allah, thank you so much for everything that you have given me in such abundance.

Wishing everyone out there a Hugely Successful New Year 2010 filled with unexpected happy suprises... (^_^)

Happy Birthday Anas

Mama's fatty boom-boom

Anas is 7 today!

I can't believe our little baby is seven!! He is a real joy in the household of Danau Kaseh. Anas is chubby & adorable. He is smart & knows how to get things going his way. He speaks well and you can have a decent conversation with him about a lot of things. He is so mischievious, he is constantly irritating Adlan & Hakim. Most fights at home are caused by Anas, unfortunately. His best friend is his only sister, Adlina. They love doing art projects together, converting big boxes into tables & buildings; medium-sized boxes into cars & trucks, & little boxes into handphones. Anas adores Adlina & Adlina lets her little brother (who is heavier than she is!) sleep in her bed with her sometimes. She reads to him.

Anas sleeps in his own bed now, but most nights he still walks over to our bedroom in the middle of the night to snuggle in with papa & mama. We let him because he is still our little baby (although he takes up so much space, sometimes he kicks me out of my own bed!).

And today, our little baby is little no more. To Anas: Papa & Mama love you SO MUCH. Happy 7th Birthday darling.. (^_^)

Happy Raya & Happy 40

Mama's darlings

The residents of Danau Kaseh celebrated 1st Syawal in Raub & Jerantut this year. It's always special being with Mak in Raub, and every time we go back, I always wish that we had gone back more often throughout the year.. Must make extra effort in future..

Santai di bawah pondok :)

2nd Syawal this year falls on 21st September, my 40th birthday. We headed back home to Melaka and on the way, we stopped in KL to have Mama's Birthday lunch at Chillies, Mid Valley. I will remember this day for the rest of my life - it's just so precious spending the quiet lunch with AZ & the kids - all warm & fuzzy feeling. Thanks to all mama's darlings for the lovely presents. Thanks baby for the personalized iPod Nano - love it!

20.09.2009 - my last day of being 30-something

40 is like the new 30 :)

Mug from Adlan, Lotion from Hakim,

Notebook from Adlina & Piggy Bank from Anas

Anas's First Ramadhan

Anas managed to puasa for the first time ever yesterday. Alhamdulillah. 

When I told him that he could take a day off today & puasa every alternate day, his response was: I want to puasa for the whole month, Mama..

We are so proud of you, Anas (^_^)

PS: Adlina, mama is also proud of you & I know Anas is able to puasa because of your strength & encouragement. You are a GREAT big sis for Anas, darling <3

A Quiet, Lazy Weekend

The Eye is quite stunning at night

Eye On Malaysia in Malacca

The residents of Danau Kaseh had a quiet and lazy weekend & it was truly blissful :)

We all went for a ride on the Eye On Malaysia on Saturday night & the experience was much better than expected! The brightly lit Giant Ferries Wheel looked stunning at night! Glad we decided to take this ride and it's a MUST if you are ever in Malacca (Anas was a little scared at first but he got over it soon!). We then parked at EQ and strolled over to Subaidah at Dataran Pahlawan for supper. Although the teh tarik was somewhat disappointing, the Tandoori Naan was Yummy!

Anas looking a bit worried

Papa & Hakim

Adlan & Hakim

Sunday lunch, Adlan helped Mama cook in the kitchen while Hakim & Adlina helped clear & set up the table. We had lasagna and garlic bread, and bread pudding & jelly for dessert. I'm gald we gave Mawar the weekend off. Really should do this more often - quiet weekend, just with the family..

Wish the weekend would last longer - it's Monday & I'm really in for a busy week this week.. sigh...

Khatam Al-Quran

It was a very proud moment for AZ and me yesterday when we celebrated the special occasion of Adlan, Hakim & Adlina having finished reading the Al-Quran for the first time. Thank you everyone who came to share the event with us late Friday afternoon; Thank you so much to Linda, Radhuana, Tati, Kak Midah, Eyta, Faizah, Asalina, Cherryl, Noridah, Kak Tini, Kak Wan & Jerd for the kueh-mueh, cakes, chocolates, fruits, gifts and angpows; Thank you Mak for coming all the way from Raub to be with us; Thank you Mak for the pulut kuning; Thank you Kak Sapura for making the curtains in 2 days :) (I hope I haven't forgotten anyone!). We are truly blessed to have so many wonderful and supportive friends and family around us. 

Finally, Special thanks to Ustaz Norzaki for teaching our kids for the past 2 years. We really appreciate your commitment and patience.

This is such an important milestone for Adlan, Hakim & Adlina. To my darlings, Mama is so proud of you. Love you all so, so much.

Syukur Alhamdulillah (^_^)

* Pictures of the event will come soon.

A Wonderful Surprise

It's personalized! Really sweet of you.

Thanks so much sayang..

I love it (^_^)

Hong Kong Disneyland

Hello Hong Kong Disneyland!! 

The residents of Danau Kaseh had so much fun in Hong Kong Disneyland last week! What a great way to de-stress after so much pressure at work!! Good family FUN! We went at the right time as the weather was perfect: sunny and cool springtime! School holidays in Hong Kong hasn't started yet, so the Park was not congested. We didn't have to queue up for almost all the rides & shows! Perfect timing!

Here's a short summary of our favourites at Disneyland:

Of all the rides, the Space Mountain roller-coaster was the most exciting! The whole ride was in pitch darkness, full of surprising drops, twists & turns. Fortunately there wasn't any loop-da-loop! Images from space like planets, novas & comets flashed by as you go past them in a fast, thrilling ride! We were so proud of Anas as he went on his first ever roller-coaster ride without crying at all! Adlan actually went on the ride 3 times (crazy!) & Adlina went on it twice! 

It's A Small World, the world famous boat ride was charming. Lots of effort must have been put into all the colourful & beautiful miniature houses, famous landmarks, figurines, dolls & animals from around the world. It was such a relaxing ride after Space Mountain! Adlan, Adlina & Anas went on the spinning teacup after that, but the rest of us gave it a miss. I felt dizzy just looking at them spinning!

Spinning Teacups - not for mama!

Adlina loved the Autopia as she got to "drive" her own car! I didn't enjoy it too much as Anas drove the car I shared with him and the ride was extremely bumpy. His steering was totally out! Thank God he has 10 more years before he can get his "L" licence :) 

Adlina driving her little car :)

Another interesting ride was the Jungle River Adventure. We had to ride through crocodiles, wild animals, head-hunters, piranhas & even a fiery volcano! Don't worry, none of them bite ;) Tarzan's Treehouse was on an island right in the jungle & we climbed up the Treehouse (which was high!). Right at the top, Anas said that he needed to pee immediately (Yikes!!). Thanks to Adlan's empty mineral water bottle, Anas became the first ever person to pee at the top of Tarzan's Treehouse :) I hope no one saw him!

Tarzan's Treehouse - no toilets at the top :)

My personal Favourites are the Live Shows: The Golden Mickeys & Festival of the Lion King. They were superb! The Golden Mickeys was like an Award show which showcased some of Disney's best loved characters like Mulan, Tarzan, Ariel, Woody & Jessie and Beauty & the Beast. The actors were fantastic singing familiar Disney tunes which we sang along. We went for the show twice & still enjoyed it tremendously the 2nd time!

The set of the Lion King was so colourful &  impressive!

Festival of the Lion King was set in a circular theatre, more like an arena. The singers were brilliant & the set impressive! Giant elephant and giraffe figures were wheeled in together with Simba the lion. There were flame throwers breathing fire and acrobats suspended from the ceiling! It was such an amazing experience.  True Disney magic!

Adlina meets Jessie

The highlight of Disneyland was the Fireworks set in the background of the castle at 7.30pm prior to closing. I heard about the fireworks before, but it was far better than what I expected. As aptly put by Adlan: the Fireworks were Beyond Awesome. Hakim was at a lost for words when I asked him what he thought of it! The Fireworks were launched in synch with Disney's music and the timing and positioning were all perfectly choreographed. I've always loved fireworks but the one we saw at Disneyland was without a doubt, the BEST one ever! It was Beyond Awesome!

Sleeping Beauty's castle at night was truly breathtaking

Time flies so fast when you're having so much fun. Two days in Disneyland went by too quickly. We checked out of Hollywood Disneyland Hotel and left for Kowloon with a heavy heart on Saturday. 

The grounds around Hollywood Disneyland Hotel 

was beautiful & perfectly manicured

Goodbye Hong Kong Disneyland! Thank you so much for such a magical experience. So many warm, fuzzy moments & happy memories... (^_^)

Time-Out

Going for the desperately needed break finally! Can't wait to spend some time with AZ & the kids.. Will write more about this when we come back next week.

Have a good week everyone! Catch up later :)

Stress

It's really stressful being a lawyer. Early on in my practice, I had consciously told myself that I must have the ability to attach to my work in the office, and then detach from it once I step out of the office. I have been able to do this quite well, especially when I was practicing civil litigation. Attach to my work at the office and in Court, then totally forget about it once I go home. Once at home, I'm just a wife and a mother.

Unfortunately, doing corporate work (especially for extremely demanding clients) is totally different and the pressure can be so tremendous that I can't help myself but bring the stress home sometimes, and AZ and the kids have to bear with unlikeable me. I just hate myself when I get hyper-sensitive and impatient. This is not me. And I don't like this me.

The past 2 weeks have been madness. Everything is top urgent. All agreements need to be executed immediately. Clashes in contract negotiations. Last minute changes in terms. I have pushed myself so hard that it's becoming unbearable. I know I have not been myself at home. I get angry with things too easily. I get too sensitive with little things. I'm so sorry to everyone at Danau Kaseh..

I'm so tired.. I just want to go home, curl up in my bed & forget the world. Can I please do that just for one day?

Adlan in KL

Adlan is in KL for 3 days with his friends from school for the Petrosains Actology trip. I wrote last year about his school winning 3rd place at the national level competition organized by Petrosains. Finally, they are going for the much awaited trip! He left early yesterday morning & I'm already missing my boy so much! 

On the contrary, Adlan is having so much fun that when I called him (5 times throughout the day yesterday), all he said was: "Mama, can you call later? I'm in the middle of something right now." Then: "Mama, I'm busy, can you call later?" Then: "Mama, it's too loud here, can we talk later?" Finally, I called him at 10pm and he said: "It was so much fun but I'm so tired right now. I will tell you all about it later ok?".  

OMG! Adlan is all grown up & not needing his mama so much! I'm all teary and missing him here & he's having so much fun without his family... sob! sob! He didn't even call me this morning.. I told myself not to call him & see if he will. He hasn't and it's already 1pm! Looks like I will have to break my resolve soon & call him if he doesn't call me by 5pm..

I know I'm so pathetic.. Mothers are just so sentimental that way, & I'm a little bit too emotional when it comes to my kids. It's terrible! I know..

It's just so difficult to let go.. but I guess eventually, I will just have to. Looks like it'll be sooner than I'm prepared for..